“We expect women to work like they don’t have children, and raise children as if they don’t work.” -Amy Westervelt
You may be wondering if every other mom feels the stress and guilt the same way you do. No matter where you are, at home or work, you feel like you should be elsewhere, being more productive.
Being a business owner is difficult enough simply because there are all kinds of obstacles that can keep you from your dream, and if you’re a mom, there are added struggles that can only make those obstacles seem more insurmountable. Let’s not even talk about most moms having to work from home with no childcare!
Women feel guilty. They feel guilty for working and guilty for not working.
Work time spills into family time, and half listening to your children’s stories and missing out on events and occasions with them can lead moms to feel like they are failing. It feels like a no-win situation, and it fuels overwhelm, exhaustion, and defeat that can lead to burnout.
So how can we minimize this?
Don’t try to go it alone
You’re not superwoman. If you can afford to get some help around the house, it’s better to pay someone to do the laundry, shopping and cleaning. That way you can spend more time on your business and with your children. If you can’t afford to pay for help, you’ll need to create a strict schedule and stick to it. Include the kids in tasks they can handle, and tell them they’re helping mommy build a business so you can all spend more time together doing the things you love.
Make time for your kids and honour the plans you make
Make it a point to make them feel like a part of your day, and honour that always. Don’t cancel or you’ll feel even worse. Balancing your children’s needs while running a business can be difficult, but it’s so important that your children never feel like they take a backseat to your business.
Focus on the good and not the mom guilt
You’re going to have many different things pulling you in different directions, so learn to say no to the things that aren’t either moving your business or your family forward.
Keep it in our own lane
Do not compare yourself to other moms. Just because Susie down the street has time to make gluten free after school snacks, homemade hummus and homeschool her children does not make you less of a mom because you can’t. You do you, and make your own rules. Think of it this way: your child will be able to be involved and learn from your struggles and successes as you navigate running a business. This is an inside look to the reality of life that sometimes kids don’t get at a young age. Involve them in your day if you can, and share your day with them if you can’t. Your kids will benefit a lot more if you follow your dream. You’ll show them what confidence, discipline, commitment, diligence, a positive attitude can do!
Don’t rob yourself of your dreams
There really is no reason for any mom to feel guilty about pursuing her life’s passion.The lessons you can teach your children by following your dreams will translate for them later as great life skills.
Remember that children learn by example. Your persistence in this will inspire them. And who knows what great things they will do because they had an amazing role model in their lives!